you shiver as you pull your knees closer to your aching body. you have lost the ability to see the light a long time ago, as the wax on the candle slowly wore itself out. you peer left, then right, then left again, and slowly tell yourself the lie that you are strong enough by yourself.
a gust of frigid wind blows in from the broken window sapping the last bit of preserved strength that you had left.
finally, you get fed up. why am i here? you keep asking yourself.
what am i doing? who am i? you throw down the book you were reading, a tattered, torn book, a book that you thought had all of the answers, a book that you are slowly beginning to think is fiction, along with the life that it recommends you lead. sick, of your self, of your lifestyle, sick of where you are. you turn to the door. it creaks open, slowly tempting you with the life it seems to promise you. you open it all the way, and you begin to run, run, run, run, run.
but you can’t. as hard as you struggle, you can’t move forward. you continue to strain, but only frustrate yourself. In pain, in frustration, in fear you cry out. sobbing, pleading to go.
finally, a revelation, you ask yourself, what is holding me back?
you turn to see a hand resting on your shoulder, slowly comforting, supporting, loving.
their face is obstructed, but it doesn’t matter, you know that this… this person won’t let go.
suddenly another hand startles you on your other shoulder, then another, then another.
soon, you realize that they are lifting you up, as you had sank to the floor in despair without realizing it.
but that doesn’t matter now.
hands pour over your shoulders, you feel their strength, their love. they pull you up. a crouch, now bent over, now standing.
finally a hand reaches below your chin, pulls your head up, looks you in the eyes.
“I told you I would not forsake you. You brothers and sisters, they love you, and they are not going to let you go.”
as you try to look into their eyes, all you see is love and the compassion that they offer you.
you step back, and begin to walk back to your place on the floor, pick up that tattered book, and sit back down.
it is still chilly tonight, but the hands on your shoulders will never let you go.
“Greater love has no one than this, that they lay down their life for their friends. ”